(Knoxville, Tenn) - Researchers at the University of Tennesee have uncovered an ancient map which shows that Macedonia was, at one time, part of Tennessee.
According to Professor H. L. Billie, professor of Automotive Erotic Antiquities, "Yeah, we done found this here map whut shows that there little Grecian country b'longed to the gret stet o Tennesee - GO VOLS!"
Professor Billie's arch rival at the University of South Carolina, Prof. Moe Beta, says that |
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the map clearly shows Macedonia as having first belonged to the Palmetto state and then claimed by Tennessee after the anullment of the contract of the Eight Lords, Proprietors, following the Revolution.
The find comes as a complete shock to scholars in Albania and Macedonia who think she was born in their countries.
According to Macedonian, Prof. Karimsky Succerov, "First it was the Turks, then the Ottomans, now it's the damned Amyericanski! Nobody! |
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Nobody Gets Mother Teresa, but US, YOU HEAR, you provincial putz! Take Alexander the Great! Take his daddy, Phillip! NOBODY GETS MOTHER!"
Mother Teresa, herself, was cremated following a life of service and devotion to the poor of Calcutta. Several flakes of Mother Teresa were tracked down for a comment by our intrepid WAKKED.COM reporter, but were too busy trying to find a grave in which to roll over.  |
